Galactica Archive Entry

 

Secrets Shared


by Larry Edwards


Title - Secrets Shared (1/1) Author - Larry Edwards Pairing - Lee Adama / Kara Thrace Rating - PG-13 Archiving - BSG 2003, Apollo/Starbuck Fan Fic, all other's please ask Warnings - Angst, Innuendo, and possibly chocolate Spoilers - Mini-Series, some season 1 Author Contact - l.edwards@gci.net

Author's Note: This is in answer to the challenge from Nancy - A rather steamy love letter ends up in the wrong hands. It could be an anonymous letter or not, your choice. But the story itself must contain the sentence: "That's too much information!"

Disclaimers- Battlestar Galactica and its characters are the property of someone much richer than me and I don't make money from these stories so please don't sue.

Summary - A letter found, a secret discovered.

The stress had definitely been getting to him; Captain Lee Adama leaned against a bulkhead on the flight deck. He ran his hand through his hair and looked around - the normal bustle was temporarily replaced with a lingering calm. The taut features of his face, the smoldering glimmer of his eyes, were bathed in the stark light of the bay. His duty shift had already ended and as a matter of fact it had been over for quite a while, but there always seemed to be things that needed his attention. That was fine by him, the extra work helped fill the lonely hours that now made up his day. Lee felt his mortality every time he looked at an empty bunk in the pilot's quarters and empty seats during a full attendance in the Ready Room.

He had never been a very outgoing person; he dwelt within the details of his profession excelling at almost all costs. A single minded determination that had seen his high marks at the Academy, his solid career path as a warrior making jumps in assignments to such places as the War College. These choices came with costs, some of which came too late for him to do anything about such things as building friendships and even more. He knew his feelings about Kara and the depth of them; however he had believed he had plenty of time to act upon them. It wasn't until his brother Zak had done something he had only dreamed of. Trying to shake his head clear of the memories Lee glanced up at the approaching sound of talking. Pushing off the frame, still dressed in his flight suit he headed towards his quarters. His mind turned again to her... Kara - closing his eyes he could almost feel the shock and gut wrenching realization that she had fallen for Zak. It had taken a while to get used to it... actually he had never gotten used to it, but it taken a while to take the frustration out of his eyes and bury it within his heart.

Pinching the bridge of his nose, he looked down and saw some pieces of paper lying on the deck. Looking around to see who it could belong too and not seeing anyone Lee knelt and picked up the semi-folded pieces of paper. It had been three pages handwritten without a name or clue about the identity of its author. There was a title - `My Secrets' which made it awkward for the young Captain to have in his hands. Glancing around reflexively, his eyes narrowed as he read the words that filled the first line - `I have a secret that burns me through and through; and these words will have to be my release... for now.' From there Lee's eyes widened at the descriptions that soon filled the page and heated his ears.

Chattering of people caused him to guiltily tuck away the pages and continue on his way. As he reached the pilot quarter's section of the ship he could hear the murmuring of voices punctuated by laughter or an occasional curse and changed his course. He needed to find a place away from crowds to investigate fully the contents of these pages. The thoughts of secrets brought his mind back to one Kara Thrace, formerly the fiance of his brother and seemingly always a part of his life. He took her for granted and paid the price. He had delved even more deeply within his work and it pained him to see the hurt in her eyes when he begged off spending time with the two lovebirds.

Even with his brother's death, the pain had not gone away, rather the jealousy had been replaced by guilt which soon had been fed by his mother's anger and accusations of blame at his father had help redirected the pain. He felt the heat of shame on his face as he navigated the darkened corridors to his destination - a secluded observation deck on the port side of the Galactica. He had used anger as a shield for so long that he had believed the accusations, but deep in his heart he blamed himself. His first thought after hearing about his brother's death was that Kara was free again. Lee had been tempted to swoop in and gather up the pieces like a thief in the night and hold them closely, tightly, and selfishly. The shame from that thought had haunted him for a long time, driving him away from her for two full years.

A harsh laugh almost escaped his mouth. The thought of a so called brave warrior, afraid of the power of another person's eyes; afraid it would be able to see deep within him and know the shameful truth. Walking into the room, a large portal opened to a view of glistening stars beyond. During alerts, the portal was sealed by a large metal shield; it was used to take astronavigation plots if the computers ever went down. Which meant it was normally empty and unused. He walked to one of the swivel chairs that gave him a good look into space. He saw some of the convoy ships and once in a while glimpsed a patrolling viper streaking by.

Climbing into the chair he opened the pages, looking at the flowing lines of blue ink that covered its surface. His eyes were drawn to where he had left off. After a while he let out a breath he didn't know he had been holding and shifted in the chair. His eyes never left the words. It was written by a woman about what she wanted to do to a certain man.

"Lucky guy." Lee murmured to himself. Interspersed within the lusty expressions and descriptions and were words of love. Seemingly the writer was using the sultry imagery as camouflage for a deeper meaning. Lee felt like a voyeuristic intruder and wanted to put down the letter. But the heat was on and he was drawn to each line, each encounter between the two participants. If only he had someone who would write like this for him. Shaking his head with a small smile he knew this wasn't her cup of tea. The last page soon in his hands he read the last part of the letter.

`This has been slightly weird, writing a lustful love letter that will never be read. But its cathartic and I can use all the free therapy I can get. I only wish you could read this and possibly live this... especially the part with the chocolate syrup, pieces of fruit and a healthy appetite.' Lee grinned at the last words that had been playfully added then carefully replaced the last page and folded the papers as they had been when he found them.

He didn't have to glance up to know he wasn't alone. He could feel her wavering form; picture her eyes bright with fear. The writer had found him and wanted her letters back; he raised his eyes trying to guess who it could be. Lee froze in place when he saw who it was.

"You were never meant to read them Lee. I am sorry, I truly am, I just needed a release, but I never wanted to damage what we have. Please don't close me out." Kara's normally firm voice was filled with trepidation. Lee still seated turned his upper body towards her she was painted in brush stokes of the shadows, the low lighting kept Lee from being able to read her features. Her body language was closed in, arms folded against her chest, her vulnerable side showing. Lee's face bathed by shadows hid the moment when his eyes narrowed in suspicion; he stood up looking down at the pages in his hand. Kara misinterpreted it, her body unwound, her arms at her side, her hands clenched in fists like the fighter she was. Shaking her head she yelled.

"Frak!" Lee's face snapped up at her comment. "That's too much information! You now have all the cards Lee!" She ran a hand through her hair shifting about like a wild animal not sure to cut and run or charge recklessly forward. Lee walked slowly towards her, his normally sharp features softened. Kara forced herself to stand still and wait though inside she wanted to run as fast as she could away from the words she feared but the fighter within her had to stay and stick it out.

"Your right Kara, it is too much." Lee took a breath and looked into her eyes. "But we can fix that with some chocolate syrup and some pieces of fruit." His face lit with a warm inviting smile. Kara's mind had not quite registered and processed the words spoken, she was in shock.

"What?" Her soft voice filled with confusion, trying to decipher his meaning. Was he just making fun of her?

"Its now time for me to tell you some of my secrets." He held out a hand to her, she stared at it for a moment, the light in her eyes and cautious smile at the corner of her mouth illustrated the dawning of realization that her world had not ended. She moved forward past his offered hand and into his arms, pulling him closely. Her head against his, Lee Adama felt at peace and looking down at Kara Thrace he knew she did too. Life isn't necessarily filled with happy endings and this was a hopeful beginning. After a while Lee whispered into her ear. "So where did you come up with some of the ideas in your letter?" Kara grinned wickedly.

"Well from an above average imagination that sank to the right depths of depravity." She shrugged almost self-consciously. "Why?" She looked up at him with a soft questioning smile.

"I think I'll have to take the contents of the letter as a challenge. Nice penmanship by the way" His smile widened as her embarrassed laughter shook her body. She then pulled back just a little from him and shook her head.

"There is no way that we could make love on the..." Her eyes widened and she covered her mouth.

"You never know what the future holds Kara." Lee grinned. "Besides I like a good challenge." As the two left together Kara leaned over and whispered in his ear.

"So Lee, tell me a secret." Lee leaned over and whispered in her ear. Kara stopped dead in her tracks, her mouth open gaping at his retreating form.

"No fraking way! How did you find out about that?! And damnit Lee! I meant one of your secrets!" She caught up to him cuffing him playfully on the shoulder. The corridor normally only filled with hiss and pinging of ship's operations were momentarily filled with warm laughter and playful bantering - this was a good first step for the two of them, they still had to work together for a common future, and they had learned that some secrets needed to be shared.

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